Emotions

The next chapter (of happy children) is about emotions.

Its about helping kids understand the 4 basic emotions, anger, fear, sadness, happiness.

The idea is to name them with words, for both me and M. Instead of physical displays, like temper tantrums, or me yelling, we learn to talk about anger. ‘I am getting angry’. It seems important to role model discussing your emotions.

My brother G, seems to do a good job of this. I have scene him tell his son, that he is upsetting him. He uses a slightly gruff voice, by the book says that is fine. This way the kids understand a reasonable approach to communicating anger. Instead of acting out on it, they can put words to it.

Throughout, you must remember not to put the kids down, as discussed in the first chapter.

One fascinating idea was for toddlers (like M), is to use a wall chart of faces with different emotions, and get her to point to the emotion she is feeling. What an awesome idea. I will try to implement this in November (when we have sufficient time to get away from the park).

I have been discussing with my own counselling the lack of fear of feel. I think I simply don’t understand what it means to be scared.

I am getting better at anger, the anger management course helped with that (which I should spend more time to complete). But the book re-iterated you need anger in your life.

The book also said sadness and crying is important. I know I often encouraged E to cry. His mum often took the common line ‘dont cry like a girl’ – which the books says is pretty bad.

Kids abuse emotions to get parents to react, so watch out for:
– tantrums – which are misuse of anger
– sulking – misuse of sadness
– shyness – misuse of something …. basically get them to atleast say hello to people.

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